Category Archives: No Contact

4 Big Reasons Why Your Ex Hasn’t Called

It’s the worst feeling ever: your boyfriend or girlfriend breaks up with you. And then in the hours and days afterward, your phone goes totally silent.

Anthony Malibu - Ex Hasn't Called

They don’t call. They don’t text.

Your ex refuses to communicate with you in any way at all.

Everything is quiet, and you’re left wondering if your former boyfriend or girlfriend still has any feelings for you whatsoever. You’re completely in the dark as to how they’re feeling, emotionally or physically, and the sensation of NOT knowing hurts worse than anything you’ve felt before.

So why won’t your ex call or text you?

What’s keeping them from wanting to hear from you again, or at least answer your text-messages and voicemails?

The answer to those questions might be internal. Meaning that your ex isn’t contacting you because of something you did, or are currently doing, that would keep them from wanting to hear your voice.

And in other cases? It could also be a lack of action on your part. Because while it’s always best to leave your ex alone for a while after they dump you, there are also some quick adjustments you can make during the interim that will help recapture their interest and even lure them back in your direction.

So why wouldn’t your ex call or contact you? Let’s examine the four MAIN reasons your boyfriend or girlfriend hasn’t been blowing up your phone… yet.

You’re Still Resisting the Breakup

A breakup isn’t like a fight. It’s not something you can win, especially right now, and especially since your ex already spent a significant amount of time making up their mind to leave you in the first place.

So resisting the breakup? That’s only going to piss your boyfriend or girlfriend off. You’re essentially ignoring what they have to say, while flying the banner of “we should still be together!” back and forth in front of their face.

Think they’re gonna listen? Of course not. Because right now, just after they dumped you, your ex wants to do only one thing: GET AWAY FROM YOU.

No, they don’t hate you. No, they don’t loathe your presence. But currently, your ex has a very poor opinion of you. You’ve lost value in their eyes, and the last thing you want to do is try to argue your case from a disadvantaged position. So the BEST thing to do? Nod your head in agreement, then turn and walk away.

Now don’t get upset; this is a temporary measure. Agreeing with and accepting the breakup is something you MUST do, but only for now. Later on, when you’ve given your ex time to miss you (and need you back in their life again), you’ll use these reconnection techniques to make them want a relationship again. But not right now. And not while the idea of ditching you is still fresh in their mind.

You’re Won’t Stop Calling or Texting Your Ex

Getting back together follows a very simple formula: you’re apart for a while, your ex starts missing you, and then contact is made again.

The problem these days, with all the text-messaging, is that no one ever gets the chance to actually MISS anyone else. So if you’re still calling or texting or Facebooking or Instagramming or whatever other thing you’re doing to your ex? That person has LOTS of you in their life… and zero opportunity to actually miss you.

Winning your ex’s heart requires that you go away for a while. I know that this is hard. It takes a lot of willpower not to look at your ex’s social media pages, or send them a few “innocent” texts to see how they’re doing. But know that NO text message is innocent. EVERY time you make contact with your ex you’re actually pushing them a little further away… at least in the beginning, before you’ve gotten to the point where your contact is welcomed by them again.

You’re Trying to Manipulate Your Ex With Guilt or Pity

We’ve all seen it; that really bad breakup that starts with crying, begging, pleading… and ultimately ends with the whole “I can’t live without you” (and sometimes even threats of hurting oneself if the other person won’t take them back).

All of that stuff is high school bullshit. It’s drama you don’t need, and worst of all, it’s demeaning to the person who does it.

Get it through your head right now: your girlfriend or boyfriend isn’t going to “come back” to you out of guilt or pity. And even if they did, would you want them to? I mean, that’s just pathetic. You’re manipulating someone into staying in a place they don’t want to be. How long do you think that will last?

And hey, wouldn’t you rather your ex WANT to go out with you again, instead of being forced or coerced into dating you for some reason? Of course you would. Which is why trying to manipulate or trick your exboyfriend or exgirlfriend into still dating you is the most damaging thing you can do to any future you might have together.

Trust me when I say your ex wants someone who’s strong, not weak. Someone who’s confident, not insecure. Someone who has VALUE.

This is why they dumped you to begin with; you no longer held the same appeal as when they first started dating you. So to get them back? You’ll need to figure out what it was that attracted your ex to you in the first place and start living that former life again. This isn’t “changing” for your ex’s sake, it’s more like going back to how things were at the beginning (i.e. honeymoon phase) of your romance. Back when everything was golden, and nothing could break the two of you apart.

Your Ex Can Still See That You Haven’t Moved On

Know what makes your former lover interested in you again? Seeing others interested in you as well.

This is where they start to question their decision. This is where they go: “Shit, he/she’s already dating someone else? Maybe I shouldn’t have broken up with them.”

The fear of actually losing you is one of the major motivating factors in getting an ex to take you back. Because while they think they can still have you? There’s no real incentive not to be single (and looking for somebody else).

When your ex looks back over his or her shoulder they should see NOTHING after the breakup. No phone calls, no texts, no Facebook updates, no Instagram posts. It should be almost like you disappeared off the face of the planet, and this will worry them. Immediately they’ll begin questioning the idea of cutting you loose, simply because you don’t even seem to care that they broke up with you in the first place.

Contact initiated by your ex is the BEST contact there is, and this is where reconciliation is only a few steps away. There are lots more ways to get your ex to call or text you. Learn what they are below, and make sure to use each of these techniques at the right time:

CLICK HERE for girls trying to get back with an ex boyfriend

CLICK HERE for guys trying to get back an ex girlfriend

And for a more complete, comprehensive guide on how to handle text-messages between you and your ex, check out the free videos at Text Your Ex Back.

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Contacting Your Ex Boyfriend – When and How to Do It

Breaking up is about being apart. This makes you miss each other, but it also creates huge gaps between you that can make future contact pretty awkward.

Anthony Malibu - When and How to Contact Your Ex

Very often you won’t know when or how to get back in touch with your ex. Maybe you’ve even tried, and your attempts at keeping in touch have been met with resistance.

If your boyfriend is cold or callous when he talks to you, it can be emotionally devastating. It can make you feel like there’s no more hope; as if he’s moved on already, and there’s nothing more you can do.

At the same time, you’ll feel like not contacting him is even worse. You’ll feel him slipping away, as if he’ll forget about you more and more as each day goes by without talking, texting, or seeing him.

There’s a 6 Step-Process to Get Back With an Ex. One of those steps is the NO CONTACT phase, where you pull away from your ex long enough to make him miss you, need you, and eagerly want to hear from you again.

But when it’s time to get back in touch? There are a variety of ways you can make contact with your ex boyfriend again. Here are just a few of them:

Facebook or Instagram Contact

Of all the ways to reopen the lines of communication, this one is rock bottom. You really want to avoid contacting your ex through social media if at all possible, because it’s one of the most impersonal ways of reconnecting.

Essentially, you’re reaching here, and desperately so. Worse, your boyfriend can easily ignore this attempt at contacting him by simply doing nothing. This will leave you wondering if he even got your message at all.

Texting Your Ex After the Breakup

Again this is impersonal, and because you sent thousands of text-messages to each other over the course of your relationship, this will get lost in a sea of ‘whatever’. Texting your ex when you haven’t seen or talked to him in a long while is a huge copout. You’re showing your insecurity and lack of confidence; you’re sweating him so much you can’t even carry on a conversation with this guy. So why the hell would he want to date you?

Now if your ex texts you, you’ll need to know EXACTLY how to respond. In that case, check out this video on what to text your exboyfriend when he does reach out to you.

Emailing Your Ex Boyfriend

Marginally better than texting, this is still not the best idea. The bad news is he can ignore the email as if he never got it, leaving you in total limbo. The good news however, is that you get to craft a longer message. You aren’t limited to a certain number of words or characters, like on Instagram, Twitter, or Facebook. You can really pour your heart out here. But should you?

Remember, when getting back in touch after a breakup you always want first contact to be short. You need to get in quick, keep things light and positive, and get out of the conversation on your own terms.

Here’s a complete guide on what to say when you make first contact with your ex boyfriend. Also included here, and even more important? What NOT to say to him if you still want him back!

Calling Your ExBoyfriend on the Phone

Here’s where you really up the ante on winning him back. Because until you’re willing to actually talk to your boyfriend, in a real live conversation? He’s never going to take your attempts at reconciliation seriously.

Up until you call him, he’ll see your texts and emails as signs of interest. He may be flattered by these things, but for the most part he’ll brush them off. In short, you’re giving up control. And you don’t have very much control to begin with, if he was the one who initiated the breakup.

There are certain times that are optimal for calling or contacting your ex. Know what these are, because when it comes to making him receptive to taking you back? Timing is everything.

Physically Seeing or Running Into Your Ex

There are two approaches to seeing your exboyfriend here. One is to just flat out show up and talk to him. And this one is risky.

Again, you don’t want to force your boyfriend into anything unwanted. He needs to NEED to hear from you again, or even see you, before you start making any moves. This requires him missing you first, so you must go through the no contact portion of the breakup reversal process. All of the steps are vital, and you can’t skip anything.

The second approach is to ‘accidentally’ show up somewhere your ex is going to be. This could require some reconnaissance (through friends, family, or even social media) but you absolutely must not let him know that you intentionally came to see him. This would look desperate, and if he smells that desperation it’s something that will immediately set you back to square ONE.

How Can I Get My Ex to Call Me?

Great question, I’m glad you asked it. Because as difficult as it is to initiate contact with someone who dumped you, the whole situation becomes MUCH easier when your boyfriend is the one who actually calls you.

There are several ways to accomplish this, and not all of them will fit your own particular breakup scenario. Read up on them and learn which one might be right for you. Then go for it, but only after you’ve gone NO CONTACT for the required period of time.

Ultimately contact is necessary for ANY reconciliation. Never be afraid of it. Never be too timid, or laid back, and fearful to make some moves of your own. Your boyfriend isn’t going to wait forever, and neither are the girls who might already be getting in line to date him.

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3 Simple Tricks That Will Make Your ExGirlfriend Come Running Back

When it comes to fixing a breakup, a lot of guys think they know what they’re doing. They see the problem as a matter of cause and effect: first you find out what the problem is, and then you come up with a solution.

Anthony Malibu - Get Her Back

Ah, if only girls were really that easy.

In truth, a girl will not always list the REAL problems she has with you. By the time she’s fed up enough to break things off, she might just want you to go away.

If this is the case, she’ll do anything just to shove you aside. She’ll bruise your ego. Tell you things that aren’t necessarily true. She might even take all the blame on herself, giving you the “it’s not you, it’s me” speech. Even when you know the problem is most likely YOU.

So how do you fix a breakup like this? When your girlfriend is being stingy with the information, and stubborn to the point of ignoring you completely?

Well, that’s when it’s time to take back CONTROL.

Acting from a position of weakness will always fail. This is exactly what happens to most people; they fail to get back together because they couldn’t stop doing “stuff”. What stuff? Well, it didn’t matter. They felt their ex slipping away, so they started doing anything and everything to get them back.

The problem with that outlook is that it ends up destroying your chances. You’re acting irrationally, and without any strength. Your ex isn’t receptive to hearing from you, so anything you do only pisses her off. And as you do more and more of it? She begins to ignore your every move. You’ve become nothing but a nuisance to her.

He Who Controls the Breakup Controls What Happens Next

Read that headline again. Whether or not you fix things and get back with your ex is determined by ONE person, not the both of you. And in every case, it’s determined by the person who has the control.

When your girl broke up with you, she seized all the control. It’s up to you to wrest it back from her, and to do that, you need to be very indifferent as to whether you get back together or not. You have to be smooth. You have to be particular. You have to demonstrate only the best and most attractive qualities, while suppressing the qualities that always drive women away.

1)   Control Yourself

To win back the interest of anyone who dumped you, you need to be on your best behavior. So eliminate anything and everything that might make you feel negative, or sad, or sulking.

Neediness is disgustingly unmanly. Clinginess is a death-sentence. Acting bitter or pissed about the relationship ending will make you seem like the world’s biggest sore loser, and will only make your girlfriend feel more secure that her decision was the right one.

Eliminate ALL of these behaviors. No matter how you feel on the inside, on the outside you have to be stone cold. And believe it or not? By not acting this way you’re going to find yourself in a much better mood. A much more positive frame of mind, from which it becomes a lot easier to re-attract your ex.

2)   Control How Your Ex Girlfriend Sees You

You have full control over how your ex sees you, so take advantage of that fact. When she looks back to see how you’re doing, you must be doing absolutely awesome.

This means you need to be happy. Excited. Exciting. You should be active and energetic and full of charisma. Instead of being alone and lonely, you should be surrounded by friends. Your social calendar should keep you so busy it’s hard to find time for anything negative in your life, and this is exactly the sort of thing that will make your girl wonder why she dumped you in the first place.

3)   Control How Much Contact You Have With Your Ex

As you already should no, there’s a No Contact Phase to every breakup. This is when you shouldn’t be talking to or texting your ex, no matter how hard that might seem, and no matter whether or not you told her you’d still “remain friends” with her.

YOU are the only person who has control over whether you reach out to your ex or not. And if she calls or contacts you? Well, that’s even better because the control then shifts to you. Each phone call, each text message your girlfriend sends after dumping you – no matter what the subject or what it’s about – erodes away just a little more of her own power. And it gives that power back to you.

So when your girl calls? Ignore it for a day before calling her back. When she texts you? Wait several hours before responding. Remember: CONTROL. You’re keeping up the appearance that you don’t need her, or desire to hear from her, even though inwardly you’re working to get her back.

There are 6 Individual Steps to getting your girlfriend back, so learn every single one of them. Every breakup has a reconciliation window, but no window stays open forever.

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