Tag Archives: exboyfriend

Boyfriend Wants Space? Here are 3 Things You MUST DO

“I just want some space…”

Is that what he said? Or maybe he worded it differently. “Maybe we should take some time apart?” Or the dreaded: “I just need time to think?”

boyfriend-wants-space

It doesn’t matter how your boyfriend said it, he always means the same thing: we’re about to break up.

Unless, of course, you know EXACTLY what to do.

Right here, right now, your boyfriend has just checked you into relationship limbo. He’s effectively saying “Don’t call me, I’ll call you.”

So you begged. You pleaded. You told him you’d “change”. In the end you let him know that you really don’t want time apart, but if he really needs it, you’ll give it to him. Right?

Well, that’s about the worst possible thing you could’ve done.

Understand something: when a guy asks for “space” what he really wants is permission to date other girls. What he’s really saying here is “hey, stick around for a while and don’t go anywhere… but at the same time, I’m free to look for other people.”

If you’re not looking to break up with your boyfriend, and you want to get your relationship back on track? You’re going to need to do three things. Here they are:

Refuse the Whole “Time Apart” Bullshit

Your boyfriend offers a time-out from your relationship, or needs space, or wants time to think… but rather than be the good little girlfriend who’s going to give him exactly that, you’re going to do the opposite. You tell him:

“No, sorry. I don’t do ‘space’. If you want to break up, fine, we’ll break up. But I’m not half-assing it, and I’m not waiting around.”

This is exactly what your guy doesn’t want to hear. The fact that he might lose you during the whole “time off” thing is going to freak him out, mainly because he thinks he can control you during this temporary breakup.

Putting your boyfriend on his back foot is the best way to make him realize you as VALUABLE. He’ll never be forced to really see you that way unless you respect yourself enough not to fall for this crap when he first pulls it.

Pre-Emptively Break Up with Him

At this point, the best thing to do is get pissed. Turn to him and say:

“Know what? If you’re really not sure about this whole thing, then I’m not either. Maybe we should just put an end to it completely, and both move on with our lives.”

This is going to scare your boyfriend right down to his balls. Why? Because he DOESN’T WANT THIS. He wanted a nice cushy little “break” where you kept calling and kept texting and kept telling him you loved him. Instead, you just broke up with him… throwing him for a complete loop.

Walk Away While You Have the Upper Hand

And after you tell him you want a breakup? WALK AWAY. Don’t look back, don’t answer your phone, and don’t respond to his text messages.

Your boyfriend will be left with the feeling that he really messed up. He screwed things big time, and he got exactly the opposite of what he wanted.

Most of all, he now stands to actually LOSE you. The fact that you’re not going to be his girlfriend anymore and he might lose you to someone else is going to create instant value in his eyes. Suddenly you’re a commodity he stands to be without, and he’s not going to want that.

Remember: your boyfriend doesn’t want a breakup. He wants a “temporary break”. This is a cowardly way of trying to keep stringing you along (which is what he wants), and now it just backfired in his face.

Now, if the whole “I need some space” thing already happened, and you missed your chance to do these three things? That’s okay. There’s still a backup plan.

First, look for the 7 signs he still loves you. These are easy-to-spot signals your boyfriend will give off when he’s really not ready to lose you.

Beyond that, there’s this One Opening Move guaranteed to make your ex almost immediately want you back! Make sure you do this one early though, because the longer you wait the harder it will be to pull it off.

In the end, NEVER accept the whole “I need space” excuse. Sitting around and waiting for your boyfriend to get back to you is almost always going to lead to a permanent breakup.

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The REAL Reason He’s Still Texting You After the Breakup

Confused by the fact your ex boyfriend still texts you? Don’t be. This is one of the most common things that can happen after a breakup.

texting-after-breakup

And it’s also very, very telling.

Look at it this way: if your ex is still sending texts beyond the day he broke up with you, chances are good he’s not 100% ready to let you go.

Any guy looking to ditch you forever is never going to do something that might be construed as leading you on.

Why? Because, to be brutally honest, he’s trying to get rid of you.

That’s why texting after a breakup is so important. It tells a lot about how your exboyfriend feels. It can also be a big indication as to whether or not he wants you back.

The first thing to look for are the 7 Signs He’s Still Interested. If you spot more than 3 of these, your relationship might be salvageable purely on the basis that you ex isn’t ready to move on.

It’s All About Control

First and foremost, text-messaging you is one way for your ex boyfriend to maintain control.

Yes, he broke up with you. Yes, you can “technically” do whatever you want. But as long as YOU think there’s still a chance of getting back together (and hell, you still want to get back together), you’re not going to screw that up by going out and dating someone else.

Your ex knows this. That’s why he’ll use text-messages as a method of control. A way of showing you just enough interest to keep stringing you along… but not enough interest that you’re back together as a couple.

It’s All About Spying on You

Texting you is also a way for your ex to keep you from seeing other people. Simple, seemingly-innocent texts such as “hey, what did you do today?” are actually your exboyfriend’s way of spying on you. He’s going to know if you’re out doing something he doesn’t want you to do. He’ll even use guilt texts to keep you from doing stuff, with the vague promise of “maybe one day… someday… we’ll get back together”.

Think about it. Has your ex said stuff like:

“I’ll always love you”

and

“We’re definitely meant to be together… maybe just not right now.”

This is because he’s stringing you along. He wants you to stay away so he can do what he wants (and possibly date other girls), but at the same time, he doesn’t want you to go away entirely.

In short, he wants to keep an eye on you. You know, just in case his next relationship fails… or he gets lovesick about your previous romance and suddenly wants you back.

What Does it Mean When he Drunk Texts You

There are two times when your former boyfriend is at his weakest: late at night when he’s alone, and when he’s drunk.

At night, being lonely, your ex will start reminiscing about the good times you shared together. He might send you a “hey” text message, or something more meaningful (and honest) like “thinking about you”. Either way, he is thinking about you. And if you want him back, that’s a good thing.

Drunk texts are a similar matter. When your ex is inebriated his guard is down. This allows his true feelings to come out; often he’ll suppress his real feelings and/or love for you because he’s trying to be “tough” or keep the breakup going. But when he’s drunk? That wall falls away, and his heart is a lot more exposed.

How to Handle it When Your Ex Boyfriend Texts You

If you don’t want your ex back? DON’T ANSWER HIM. Anything you do or say — no matter how innocent — will be construed as interest.

If you actually do want your ex back? DON’T ANSWER HIM! At least not right away. Creating space and unavailability is the first step in creating longing again. And you can’t get him back until he actually longs for an needs you.

Now, there’s also a step-by-step blueprint for Texting Your Ex Back. This is basically a series of text-messages you can send him that will, if you time it right, actually make him want YOU.

Learn about these texts if you’re interested in reversing your breakup. And remember, no matter what: texting after the breakup ALWAYS means something!

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5 Signs Your Breakup Might Only Be Temporary

Breaking up can sometimes seem like the end of the world. You don’t eat, you don’t sleep… you can’t even get out of bed because you miss your ex so much!

5-signs-breakup-might-be-temporary

But then, only a few days or a week later? WHAM! You’re suddenly back together. All of that pain and drama was for nothing, and everything is right with the world again.

So how can you tell when your breakup is real?

Are there signs that your ex is really over you for good?

How can you spot the signals given off when your breakup is only going to be a temporary thing?

Below you’ll find 5 big signs that your ex isn’t truly finished with dating you. Recognizing and exploiting these signals can actually help you get back together sooner, rather than later, and reduce the risk of a permanent breakup.

1. Your Ex Keeps Texting You

Text-messaging shouldn’t just drop off after a breakup, it should end entirely. Because if your boyfriend or girlfriend is truly no longer interested? They’ll realize that texting you would only give you false hope.

Any kind of post-breakup contact is an indication of one or two things: interest or regret. Either your ex is still interested in what you’re doing (who you’re with, whether you’re going to start seeing other people, etc…) or they’re showing some regret for leaving you behind.

This goes no matter what your ex says in the text messages. They can claim the messages are innocent and mean nothing, but should know that they don’t.

2. Your Ex Wants to See You

Breaking up correctly is like ripping off a band-aid; it hurts a lot to do it quickly, but at least the pain is over fast. But an exboyfriend or exgirlfriend who insists on still seeing you, or even better, running into you by ‘accident’? That person is reconsidering the breakup altogether.

Long-term relationships can leave mental, emotional, and even physical connections behind. There is usually a NEED for that person, a void that’s left after they’re gone.

Even if they’re the one who initiated the break, your ex might be addicted to contact with you, in one form or another. Keep in mind that needing to see you is a definite sign that they’re not yet ready to call it quits.

3. Your Ex Wants to be Friends

Does your ex really want you as a friend? No. What they want is to continue part of the relationship; ideally, the part where they get to see what you’re doing and keep tabs on you while the decide whether or not they want you back.

Agreeing to be friends with your ex boyfriend or girlfriend will NEVER get them back. In fact, the best thing to do in such a situation is refuse to remain friends at all… then pull out these 3 amazing moves that will make your ex miss you – and need you back – almost immediately.

Friendship is always a bad choice. Stick around as ‘friends’ for too long and your ex will never get to see you as a potential partner again, eliminating any possible chance of reversing your breakup and getting back together. The LAST thing you want is to fall into the Friend Zone. Especially if you’re trying to fix things and win your lover back.

4. Your Ex is Trying to Make You Jealous

When you see your former boyfriend or girlfriend out partying, whooping it up, or even grinding up against someone new for your benefit? It’s because they know you’re going to get jealous and they WANT you to feel that emotion.

Jealousy is your ex’s way of sticking it to you. It’s his or her way of making you want to chase them. Taking you back is one thing. Getting you to come crawling back is quite another. Because if you do that? They can restart the relationship on their terms, which usually means they’re going to abuse your love for them.

5. Your Ex is Suddenly Nice to You Again

One of the biggest signs that a breakup might be a mistake is when your ex boyfriend or girlfriend starts acting the way they did at the beginning. You know what I’m talking about: back to right before you were dating, when the two of you were still trying to woo or impress each other.

Being apart can also offer clarity. You’ll see things differently when you’re apart than when you’re together every day. You’ll start to miss things. Regret things you might’ve said or done. This will lead you to want to be nice to your ex, which in turn, can get your head spinning with the idea of wanting to date them again.

“Wow, I forgot it could be this good. Maybe it could be this good again.” – That sort of thing.

What to Do if You Want Your Ex Back

Getting back together after an unwanted breakup is nothing more than a series of taking the right steps. The only problem? All too often, most people make all the wrong moves.

They do this out of frustration, out of anger, and out of loneliness. Worst of all, they do it without realizing it’s having exactly the opposite effect: it’s driving an ex away rather than drawing them closer.

First, make sure you’re not making any of the 7 Biggest Breakup Mistakes. Commit even a few of these, and you can kiss your relationship goodbye forever.

Second, check out the amazing guide The Magic of Making Up. Author and relationship expert T.W. Jackson gives you a step-by-step, foolproof plan for making an ex need you back in their life again, no matter how long it’s been since the breakup.

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10 Big Signs He’s Ready to Come Back

So you broke up… and you’re totally confused. Your ex boyfriend is sending mixed signals about how he feels, and whether or not he wants the relationship to continue. Knowing what he’s thinking is impossible. And knowing when it’s okay to move on? Well, that’s even harder.

So how do you know when he’s ready to come back? The following are 10 big signs that your ex is rethinking the breakup, and might be ready to make a move in your direction:

10 Signs Ex Boyfriend Wants You Back

1. He Still Wants to Be Friends

Believe it or not, this happens out of insecurity. Your boyfriend isn’t looking for another ‘friend’. He’s looking to keep tabs on you during the breakup, just in case he wants you back.

Think of it this way: the friendship is his insurance policy. Because as long as you’re still buddies? He can talk to you, keep track of you, and even ask about your dating life. Being friends grants him all of those things, which is like an inside look into what you’re doing.

Be if he truly wanted to be broken up for good? Being friends with you would be uncomfortable for him. It simply wouldn’t be something he wants.

2. Your Ex Boyfriend is Still Texting You

Once again, this serves as an umbilical cord, connecting the two of you while your boyfriend tests out the breakup. Because if he’s still texting you even after he dumped you? There are only two main reasons for that: to keep stringing you along, and for sex.

Stringing you along isn’t malicious, by the way. He’s doing it selfishly, and because it makes him feel secure that you still want him. The more you text with each other, the more ‘normal’ things seem for him, even though you’re no longer together. Normalcy = comfort, and if there’s one thing you don’t want your ex boyfriend to be right now, it’s comfortable with the breakup.

Texting you for sex is another option. Many guys will keep you at their fingertips for whenever they’re feeling lonely, or horny, or both. Your boyfriend knows you still love him, and that you probably want him back. He knows you’ll come running if he texts you, yet after the deed is done he might have different feelings. Keep this in mind. Be careful with how you handle such contact, because you don’t want to get hurt.

3. He’s Still Following You on Social Media

This is a big one these days. A guy who’s totally done with dating you will want to eradicate all trace of you as soon as possible, and he’ll do that by unfollowing you and unfriending you on every one of his accounts.

Moreover, he’ll do this for another reason: he doesn’t want to see what you might be doing. Seeing you dating someone else could be hurtful, or to be honest, maybe he simply doesn’t care anymore. Losing you as a Facebook friend or Instagram follower means nothing in this case, so he’ll simplify his life by cutting you off.

So yes, if he’s still following you? It could be a sign he wants you back. At the very least, it’s definitely a sign of interest. So be very careful about what you put on your social media accounts, and no matter what you do, never look as if you’re needy.

In most cases, you can even use social media to get your boyfriend back. There are lots of tips and tricks to try out in that link, so make sure you learn what they are!

4. Your Ex is Asking Your Friends About You

When your exboyfriend is getting ready to come back to you, he’ll send out certain feelers. One of the bigger ones? He’ll want to know how your friends feel about the two of you, and also, how you’re doing without him.

If an ex starts asking around for you, it’s crucial your friends know what to say. Telling him you’ve been lonely and miss him is a HUGE mistake! Even if you are lonely and do miss your ex, the last thing you want to do is let him know it. It’s always best for your ex to think you’re doing better without him than with him, which will make him feel like the loser of the breakup and create an actual NEED to have you in his life again.

5. Your Ex Boyfriend is Talking About the Past

Nostalgia is a powerful motivator. During a breakup – any breakup, no matter who you are – you’ll replay certain aspects of the relationship in your mind. Over and over you’ll go over the good times; the trips you took, the great memories you made, the best sex you had… all of those things become glorified and promoted as the best aspects of dating YOU.

Now, if an ex sees more bad times than good? He’s not going to talk about the past. In fact he’s going to avoid speaking about it entirely. So if he’s speaking about your past, especially in fond terms? It’s a tremendous sign he might be ready to give things a second shot.

6. Your Ex Calls You Out of the Blue

Ever get that phone call or text message? It might be something heartfelt, such as “I was thinking about you” or “I was missing you today”, or it might be as simple as the word “Hey”. The truth however, is that your ex is obviously thinking about you. He got caught up in a moment of weakness, and he went out on a limb to put the ball in your court.

Whenever your ex contacts you from out of the clear blue sky it’s one of the biggest signs of weakness in the world. He’s definitely reconsidering the breakup, or at the very least, is trying to figure things out. This is the point where he’ll try to see you again, even if he attempts to downplay it as a casual hangout.

Make sure you know exactly what to say when your ex boyfriend calls you! If you know which topics to bring up, and which to avoid, you can advance the reconciliation process to mere days or even hours rather than wait weeks or months to see if he wants you back.

7. Your Boyfriend Wants to Exchange ‘Things’ With You

Ever break up, trade eachother’s things back, and then get a phone call weeks later? “Oh hey, I found some of your DVD’s… maybe I could swing by and drop them off?”

Well that phone call is bullshit. It’s your ex’s way of trying to physically see you, and that’s a good sign. Anything important that he needed from your place would’ve been taken care of long before now, so if it’s weeks after the breakup and he’s still trying to exchange stuff with you, it’s merely a smokescreen for trying to see you again.

8. Your Ex Wants to Meet Up with You

This is it. The big one. Your boyfriend broke up with you, told you to go your own way, and now for some reason or another, he wants to see you again.

It doesn’t matter what reason he gives. It could sound legitimate, or it could be totally lame. The best thing to do is accept it for what it is, and allow him to pick a time and place. The worst thing to do would be to interrogate him with “What? Why? What do you want to say to me?” because this will embarrass him and turn him off to the whole thing.

When you DO go to see your ex for the first time after the breakup, you should know exactly how to handle it. Read this complete guide on how to handle the reunion date in such a way it’ll make your ex boyfriend want to see you again and again and again.

9. Your Ex Wants to Have Sex With You

Yup. It happens all the time, and especially if you’ve both been lonely. Sex with your ex might seem like a good idea, and it’s certainly something you’ll want, but in the long run, you need to be careful with how much, ummm… physical ‘access’ you give to your ex boyfriend.

There are times when having sex with an ex is okay. But if you want him back as a boyfriend again? You’ll need to manipulate the situation down some constructive avenues before any of the clothes come flying off.

Learn exactly when it’s okay to sleep with him, and when it’s better to withhold physical contact. Sex should never be used as a weapon, but you also can’t use it as a reward or lure to falsely win him back.

10. Your Ex Boyfriend Stays Connected with Your Family or Friends

Someone who’s looking to break ties with you is going to break them all. He’ll stop calling, texting, emailing… he’ll drop you on Facebook or Instagram, etc.. etc… etc…

That said, an ex boyfriend will have to leave your friends and family alone as well, especially if he wants to move on. So even if he’s close with your friends, or best pals with your brother? Steering clear of these people is always a sign that your ex doesn’t see himself having any kind of future with you.

The opposite, of course, is always true: an ex who keeps in touch with the closest people in your life is an ex who isn’t ready to lose you entirely. Every tiny piece of contact or commitment that he can keep going is just one more thread tying him to you, and in the long run, makes it just that much easier to re-insert himself in your life again.

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5 Things You MUST DO Immediately After Getting Dumped

When a relationship ends, one of two things can happen. Either you both walk your separate ways, or the two of you eventually decide give the romance a second chance.

Getting Dumped Anthony Malibu

Now we all know people who have gotten back together. Couples who’ve broken up, missed each other, and ended up dating each other again.

When this happens, the reason is always the same: these people are still attracted to each other. They’d rather be together than apart, but most of all they still see value in each other.

Value in the relationship.

For this reason, what you do immediately AFTER your boyfriend or girlfriend dumps you is the single most important factor in deciding whether or not they’ll want you back. Your actions, your attitude – these are things your ex is paying VERY close attention to, as they help them determine whether or not dumping you was the right decision.

The Main Reasons People Don’t Get Back Together

When people don’t get back together it’s usually because the ‘dumper’ is totally turned off by the ‘dumpee’. They do and say things that end up driving their partner away, even while they believe these actions will make their ex miss, love, and need them again.

In truth, it’s very easy to drive your ex away. The days and weeks after any breakup are a very fragile time, and the very things you’re doing to try and get back together can often be responsible for making sure your ex NEVER wants to date you again.

So what actions are good? Which ones are bad?

How can you bring your ex back to you – physically and emotionally – without destroying their opinion of you and making it so that they don’t really want you back?

Below you’ll find five post-breakup moves that are not only safe, they’re actually CRUCIAL to reversing your breakup. Stick to these and you’ll never push your ex away; in fact, you’ll actually be drawing them emotionally closer by making them need you again, in many of the original ways you first fell in love.

#1) Don’t Fight Your Ex’s Decision to Break Up

It’s the first thing that happens after you get dumped; you FIGHT.

You fight against the breakup. You fight to “save the relationship”. You even fight to find out why your boyfriend or girlfriend suddenly decided to end things, even though their decision was probably not that sudden at all.

All this fighting is something your lover expects. They came totally prepared for it. They have an answer for just about every one of your questions, and the ones they don’t have an answer for just make them clam up and say nothing.

And as you continue demanding explanations and begging them to reconsider? You devalue yourself. As a person, a partner, a potential boyfriend or girlfriend… you’re showing your ex that no matter what happens from this point out, YOU need them a whole lot more than THEY need you.

NEWSFLASH: You’ll never convince your ex not to break up with you during the initial ‘break up’ speech. At best you’re delaying the inevitable. At worst you’re forcing them to see you in the worst possible light, at your worst possible moment.

#2) Show Willingness to Walk Away From the Relationship

Instead of fighting, you need to demonstrate STRENGTH. This is what your partner secretly wants anyway, and it may very well be the reason they’re no longer into you.

So DON’T fight. DON’T argue. DON’T throw yourself at your ex’s feet, promise to ‘change’, beg or plead for them to reconsider… instead of doing all those pitiful, awful things, get up and JUST WALK AWAY.

That’s it. It’s really that simple. By walking away after your ex dumps you you’re refusing to show your cards. In a way, your refusal to argue is actually the same as counter-rejecting them. And this puts you in a much better position later on.

EVERY SINGLE MINUTE that you fight the breakup slips you one step further AWAY from reconciliation. The longer you take to accept and agree, the further you slide down that slippery slope. With each second that ticks by you’re giving your ex that much more power over you. And this is power you’ll need later on, when it’s time to use these reconnection techniques to draw your ex back into a relationship again.

#3) Refuse to Chase After Your Ex

Once you walk away? That’s IT. You’re done with your ex boyfriend or girlfriend, at least for now.

Most people who get rejected end up chasing their ex in one way or the other. Whether it’s phone calls, text messages, or even just stalking your ex on their Instagram or Facebook accounts, this is probably the biggest of all possible blunders you can make (see this list of the 12 biggest breakup mistakes).

Chasing your ex looks desperate. It displays weakness, at a time when you need to be strong. It makes you seem needy, but more than that, it puts your ex up on a pedestal where even they start thinking they’re too good for you.

In addition, right after the breakup is when your boyfriend or girlfriend wants to see you the LEAST. Let’s face it, they dumped you because they’re sick of you, at least for now. So running after them at this point is only going to make them run harder, and since they’re the one with the head start you’re never going to catch them.

Eventually, if you do leave your ex alone for a while? They slowly begin to miss you again. They think about you MORE when you’re not around, and LESS when you’re constantly trying to get in touch with them. So by not chasing your ex you’re actually getting closer to catching them again. Just like by not chasing after a lost dog (which will only make it run away even faster) you can stop, kneel down, and let the puppy come to you.

#4) Disappear Like a GHOST

Want your ex to really miss you? Well then you’ve got to totally disappear.

When I say totally, I mean just that. It’s not enough that you don’t call or text message your ex. You have to disappear from the world of social media as well.

Think about it; if your ex dumped you, they’re going to look back at you to see what you do. They want to know how you’re handling it, and checking your Facebook and Twitter and Instagram accounts is a very good, very secretive way of checking up on you.

Now imagine your ex goes to look at these things and they see nothing. No updates. No activity at all. Suddenly, they begin to worry. Because instead of running home to change your status or throwing up sappy song lyrics all over your page, you haven’t done ANYTHING at all.

To your ex, this can only mean one thing: you’re out with someone else. You’re doing other things, and you’re having fun and living your life without them. This is exactly the opposite of what your boyfriend or girlfriend wants. They expect you to be doing the same old thing, so when you’re not, it puts them out of their comfort zone.

#5) Immediately Move on With Your Life

And speaking of being out with someone else? This is the BEST time in the world to do just that.

When your ex dumps you, the greatest revenge is living well. This means going out, having fun, and most important of all, being seen with OTHER people.

So go out on dates. Enjoy yourself. Don’t even hesitate for a second thinking you ‘need time’ or that it’s simply ‘too soon’ after your last relationship ended. Remember: you got DUMPED. Which means that you’re the “loser” of the relationship and your ex (for now at least) is the “winner”. To reverse those roles, you’ve got to show your former boyfriend or girlfriend that you don’t care at all about them anymore. Even if you totally do.

And no, going out with someone doesn’t mean you have to marry them. You’re simply having fun; taking a few dates here and there to get back on the proverbial horse. There’s nothing at all wrong with seeing someone else, and it’s a great way to make your ex totally jealous. In some cases it can jar your ex into taking action, because until you actually start dating again your breakup might not be final in your ex’s eyes.

So to know how they really feel about you? Let your boyfriend or girlfriend see you with your arm around someone else. If that’s not going to prompt a phone call or text message, nothing else will.

There are a list of signs and signals your ex will give off when he or she wants you back. Look out for them, and make sure you’re doing the right thing immediately after the breakup.

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7 Quick Moves That Will Get Your Ex Back

When people get dumped, the only thing they can focus on is reversing the situation. They work night and day, they send text after text, make call after call… they do anything and everything to make their relationship right again, even if the things they are doing are all wrong.

Anthony Malibu - 7 Moves to Win Your Ex Back

The problem is exactly that; everyone moves too quickly. They’re so desperate to get back together they don’t stop to recognize that the mistakes they’re making are killing their chances.

In the early stages, it’s often better to do nothing at all. Because when you’re committing some of the 12 biggest blunders that will drive your ex away, you would’ve been better off just sitting there and not doing anything.

That said, what about getting your ex back FAST?

Are there ways you can speed up the process of making your ex miss you? Make them need you back sooner, rather than later on?

Maybe even skip the whole No Contact phase?

Well, no. Unfortunately for everyone, No Contact is a necessary step in creating need for you again. But that’s not to say you have to sit there and do nothing during this crucial time. Because there are actions you can take – moves you can make – that will accelerate the later on phases of fixing your breakup.

The things you do NOW, immediately after your boyfriend or girlfriend dumps you, can affect the speed at which you get back together when your ex finally does come around. For this reason, it’s important to learn exactly what to do, as well as what NOT to do, while working to make your lover want and need you back.

The following 7 actions will help you through the No Contact phase, and at the same time, create an environment where your ex starts itching to see or hear from you again. The more of these moves you can make, the quicker things will come together when it’s time to get back in touch with and finally contact your exboyfriend or exgirlfriend.

Agreeing With and Accepting The Breakup

Think you can “fight for” your relationship? Change your ex’s mind? Wrong. You can’t do either of those things, at least right now.

In the very beginning, the only thing you can do is ACCEPT the breakup. The sooner you do this the better off you’ll be, because you’ll look a lot less needy and desperate later on.

Nothing is going to fix your romance right away. 99% of the time, your ex wants to stew for a while. Either they’re mad at you, or disappointed, or whatever it is, but the hard truth of things is this: they no longer see you as valuable anymore.

Before they’ll even think of taking you back, you’ve got to prove them wrong. So arguing and fighting against the break right now is only going to make things worse. The best thing to do? Agree with it. And the best way to agree is to watch this opening moves video and follow these instructions exactly.

Removing Yourself From Social Media

Know what happens right after your ex dumps you? He or she looks back over their shoulder. They want to see where you go, what you do. How you handle things, or even better, mishandle them.

How are they going to do this? Facebook. Instagram. Texts from friends. Your ex is going to look at your photos and your updates and your status changes and he or she is going to gauge your reaction by watching what you do next.

The best thing to do here is absolutely nothing at all. Don’t even bother logging into social media for the first few days. If this is hard for you, TOUGH. You’ll need to make hard choices like this if you want to win your ex back.

Think about what happens when you completely disappear like this. Your ex has NO IDEA where you went. In vanishing, you create a void in your ex’s life where you used to be. They begin to bug out because they can’t find you; they don’t know where you are, who you’re with, or what you’re doing.

All of these thing will help spark renewed interest in you on your ex’s part. And this is exactly what you want at this stage of the game.

Rebuilding Yourself in Your Own Best Image

Let’s go back to when your ex first fell in love with you. What did you look like? How did you act?

Were you a lot cooler around your boyfriend or girlfriend? Did you act more confident? Did you enjoy yourself more, and by default, were you happier and more optimistic than you were at the end?

All relationships go through changes, and many of them are for the worse. When the honeymoon phase is over and the ‘glow’ wears off, people will often begin taking each other for granted. They begin fighting over stupid crap. They begin harboring jealousy over the dumbest of shit.

What you need to do is remember the beginning again. Recall how you were, and how you acted (and reacted) around your ex. Your probably laughed more, the both of you. You had more fun. The relationship was still young, and you were still out to impress each other.

These things are absolutely crucial to making your ex want you again. Later on during the process of getting back together, you’ll use nostalgia triggers to bring your boyfriend or girlfriend mentally – and emotionally – back to the beginning of your relationship. So when that finally happens? You’ll need to know exactly how to act.

Preparing Mentally For Your Reconciliation

There’s no hope for you if you’re a crying, sobbing wreck. Your lover isn’t going to take you back out of pity, or guilt, or any of those things, so dry your eyes and start getting yourself together emotionally for when you start communicating with your ex again.

Likewise, don’t be angry. No one likes a sarcastic, biting person who drops passive-aggressive comments because he or she still feels bitter about the breakup. No matter what happened to end your relationship, you need to get past it if you want any chance at all at getting back together. And yes, this even includes cheating.

So clear your mind. Mentally prepare yourself for the day you talk to your ex again. You’ll need to be cheerful and you’ll need to be optimistic. Maybe even forgiving too, if you were the person who got wronged.

Preparing Physically For Your Reconciliation

And how about physically? Were you in better shape when you first started going out? Did you dress better, look better, even smell better? If so, it’s time to get those things in order as well. Because the better you look, act, and feel, the greater your chances of keeping your ex attracted to you.

We all know looks aren’t everything. But when it comes to first impressions, you’ll need to do your best. At one time, before you even spoke to each other, you and your partner sized each other up physically. So if you want the best chance of getting back together again, make sure your ex likes what they see.

Yes, this means hitting the gym. It also means hitting the mall. Get new clothes, a new outfit, new shoes, new glasses. Grab a new tan. When these things start coming together, you’ll feel better about yourself. This will of course translate into renewed confidence, which is another big trigger in making your lover want you again.

Rebuilding Your Social Life in Fantastic Ways

At first, your ex will watch you disappear. They’ll wonder where you went. You’ll be a mystery for a while, and this is a good thing.

When you finally reappear? Things need to be AWESOME. No matter what you do, or where you go, it’s got to be the best thing and the best place ever.

At this point you’ll come back to social media. When your ex sees your posts, he or she will see you surrounded by friends and family. They’ll see you doing amazing things, going really cool places, and in every single picture, smiling like there’s no tomorrow. And this is because you’re not just ‘good’ after the breakup. You’re totally great.

Again, every ex on the planet wants to see their former lover fail. This isn’t because they’re hateful, it’s because we all like to think people are better off WITH us. So when your ex sees you having the time of your life without them? Two things happen.

One, your ex becomes jealous. After all, why weren’t you doing all these amazing things while you were together with them? Were they not worth it?

Two, your ex starts questioning the breakup. And this is because you seem to be needing them a LOT less than they think you did… which starts them along the path of “hey, maybe I actually needed this person MORE than they needed me.”

Allowing Your Ex to See You Out With Other People

This one is huge. Because as much as you probably think you’ll scare your ex away once they think you’ve started dating again, actually just the opposite happens.

When your ex sees you with someone else, they always want you more. This is because you’ve suddenly proved value. The person they dumped so callously is now on someone else’s arm, which makes them question whether they actually had something GOOD when they were with you.

And if you followed the other six moves? They will think that. All of a sudden your ex will be wracked with indecision. Haunted by regret over having let you go when someone else scooped you up so quickly.

And hey, you don’t need to ‘date’ date this person. All you need to do is go out with them. Even if it’s a casual acquaintance, your former boyfriend or girlfriend doesn’t know that. Even if it’s nothing more than a platonic or practice date, it’s still something that will set your ex’s teeth on edge.

Other Ways to Get Your Ex to Want You Again

Fixing ANY breakup is essential about the same thing: reversing your current situation.

You want to reverse how your boyfriend or girlfriend sees you right now. You want to reverse the decision they made to end things. Ultimately, you want to reverse the steps that got you here. Walk backwards, up along the path that leads back into the really cool relationship you once had.

This is where Breakup Reversed takes over.

breakup-reversed-system-lg

This stand-alone, step-by-step system by relationship expert Robert Parsons has helped tens of thousands of couples reunite with one another and fix their broken relationships.

Over the course of more than a decade? Breakup Reversed has proved itself golden with a whopping, guaranteed 94.7% Success Rate!

This means that more than 9 out of 10 couples who employed these reversal techniques ended up reconciling in one way or another. For more information on that, check out the glowing reviews and testimonials as shown below.

breakup-reversed-testimonials

When it comes to breaking up, and making up, you only get one REAL shot at it. It’s not something you can keep trying over and over again when you get it wrong, because very quickly you’ll find that you’ve driven your partner away.

For this reason alone, you want to arm yourself with all possible knowledge before making a single move. And reading Breakup Reversed is like loading yourself to the max, and then approaching your breakup with all guns blazing.

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Ex Boyfriend Already Dating? Here’s How to STEAL HIM BACK!

“I need some space…” he said, or maybe “some time to myself.” Only that time must have included some other people, because all of a sudden your ex boyfriend is DATING AGAIN.

Anthony Malibu - Steal Your Boyfriend Back

It hits you like a ton of bricks; that gut feeling of hopelessness. All those beautiful plans you made, the time you spent together – all of it gone – lost, forever, in the blink of an eye.

And if you tried to get him back? Obviously you failed. Your boyfriend is dating someone else now, and he has a new girlfriend. Someone else is kissing him. Someone else is in his bed.

Some other girl is making him happy, which means there’s no longer a shot at ever fixing your breakup and getting back together, like you one day somehow planned to do with him.

Or is there???

Want the truth? EVERY breakup has a path to reversal. Even the ones that led your boyfriend in another direction, to where he suddenly took up with someone new.

Keeping this in mind, if you’re not ready to give up on your boyfriend just yet, there’s still hope. Because there are lots of ways to get him back, even when he’s currently in the arms of another woman. Especially if he’s in the arms of another woman, actually, because right now, as his exgirlfriend? You’re working from a position where you now have certain advantages that you never had before.

Steps to Get Your Boyfriend Back From His New Girlfriend

Regardless of how long it’s been since you broke up, the important thing here is timing. Because there’s a certain time period (the honeymoon stage) where you’ll NEVER be able to win your boyfriend back from his new relationship… but there’s also a window of opportunity where it actually becomes easier to change his mind and make him fall back in love with you again.

It’s during that later stage that you need to strike. That’s when you need to make your move, and not a second before. Because if you act too soon? You’ll push him in the other direction. If you wait too long? You run the risk of losing his interest.

Getting your boyfriend back is a balancing act. Especially so when he’s already in a new relationship with some other girl. Here are the steps you’ll need to steal him away from his new girlfriend, and bring him back to you again:

Step 1 – Acceptance and Withdrawal

Your first move is always the same; you must accept and agree with your ex’s decision to break up. This means you MUST stop fighting it, no matter how much you still love him, and you MUST stop trying to get him back.

Calling, texting, emailing, Instagram, Facebook; if you’re doing these things you’re still chasing him, even if you say that you’re not. Only once you’ve agreed that yes, you should probably be apart from one another, will your ex start to see you as an ally (i.e. someone he can talk to and confide in) rather than a crazy exgirlfriend who still isn’t over him for one reason or another.

Step 2 – Waiting Out the Honeymoon Phase of his Rebound Relationship

If your boyfriend started dating this new girl almost immediately after breaking up with you, you’re probably pissed off. In reality however, this is a pretty good thing. Here’s why:

Right now, your ex is in a rebound relationship. He’s enjoying the comfort and companionship (and let’s be honest, the attraction and the sex) of a new romance, and everything is exciting to him. There’s NOTHING you can do right now… NOTHING you can say to stop him, or her, or their budding new affair.

In fact, your boyfriend is going to see any resistance on your part as jealousy. He’ll pay no mind to it. He’ll chalk it up to you still wanting him back, which defeats the purpose of step 1.

However, your ex is on a rebound right now, and this is good news. Why? Because the roller coaster of a rebound won’t last forever. It’ll only last until he gets bored of this new girl, or tired of her crap, or sick of something she does that’s different from what you did for him.

In other words, he’s going to be comparing this girl to YOU. Why? Because he just dated you. He’ll take the bad things this new girl does and hold them up to the candle of all the cool things you did well. This glorifies you in his eyes, and the first major fight the two of them have? That’ll be the first time your ex calls or texts or reaches out to you in the middle of the night, possibly to get your opinion on things, and definitely because he misses you.

Once again, this won’t happen if you haven’t fulfilled step one. Learn how to agree with the breakup (even if the breakup already happened) by watching this free opening moves video and understanding there’s a right and wrong way to do this important step.

Step 3 – Contacting or Reconnecting With Your Ex

When the time is right, your boyfriend will call you. Or maybe he’ll text you, just to test the waters. When this happens, you need to be COOL. And to be cool, that means you need to shed all of the anger, hate, bitterness, or sorrow you might have been feeling toward him all these last weeks.

Yes, he left you. Yes, he has a new girlfriend. And yes, as much as this pisses you off, you’re going to need to put all that aside in order to be COOL with him. Know why? Because a cool exgirlfriend is a SAFE ex girlfriend.

You need your ex to feel safe in talking to you. In confiding things to you. If he suspects you’re going to rat him out or go running to his new girlfriend with any info he might give you your boyfriend will clam up and never call you again.

So LISTEN to him. Be understanding, even if it hurts. Basically, you want to establish a neutral, almost “friendly” trust with him. That way you can seek out and make note of the problems within his new relationship, so that later on, you can use those problems as leverage to get him back.

Look at it this way; every relationship has chinks in its armor – even the best ones. By studying the weaknesses of your exboyfriend’s new romance, you can put yourself in prime position to strike when the iron is hot. Which will usually be after a major fight, when your boyfriend is emotionally at his weakest and most vulnerable. This is when he’ll be most nostalgic about your past relationship. This is always when he’ll be most susceptible to wanting you back.

Other Steps to Getting Him Back From His New Girlfriend

You’ve read three big steps so far that will help pry your man back from the arms of another woman. But guess what? There are 5 more.

There is a full 8 Step Process To Stealing Your Boyfriend Back from his new girlfriend, so make sure you learn ALL of them! Having a plan will always give you the best possible chance for success.

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My Boyfriend Says He Lost Feelings For Me – How Do I Get Him Back?

Hi Anthony!

First of all, I enjoy reading your articles about how to get the exboyfriend back. It makes a lot of sense. But that exboyfriend of mine is saying to me, “I’m way down the road,” and also, “I have lost feelings for you.” The reasons he left we could fix together, for sure, but he never talked about how unhappy he was in the relationship before the breakup. We just abruptly broke up. Here are the reasons for the breakup: My obsession with rescuing animals, (no time for him), religious issue(my saying grace over the food whenever), drinking/partying issue (can\’t drink much, diabetic), no sex issue. That’s it.

He said he lost sexual attraction for me. Since then I have stop rescuing, gotten rid of all my animals except 4 cats. I told him that. I have a lot of time for him. I pleaded with him to give me another chance. He was negative about it. Said he lost all feelings for me. That we should go find better people to be with.

We never argued, and always went on fabulous vacations, had a blast every time. I have given him his space, but have sent him emails that he has totally ignored. His ex wife who I\’m friends with told me that he has moved on, and I should too. I even sent him an invite out for a drink, but he didn\’t respond at all. Would you method work on him? How can I work my way back? I love him. Thanks, Margery

Breakup Advice Separator

Hi Margery!

Sorry to hear about the problems you’ve been having with your boyfriend! It’s always sad to hear about stuff like this. You sound like you’ve been a good girlfriend and you’ve done just about everything possible to keep the relationship going, only to have him continually reject your attempts at fixing things.

It sounds a lot like he is losing interest, but it’s hard to really know until you’ve actually let him go yourself. So far you haven’t done that. Your constant attention to him (calling, going to his hockey game, inviting him out for drinks) is a constant reminder that you’re still there, waiting for him, wanting him, ready to take him back the moment he gets bored or feels like he needs you. Only he won’t feel like he needs you until he turns, looks to see where you are, and finds out that you’ve already gone away.

When’s the last time you talked to him? Emailed or texted him? What happens if you stop all contact – does he eventually call or email you? The fact he kissed you before his hockey game may have been a good sign, but I need to know more about how long he lets a lack of contact ‘go’ before he starts missing you or needing to hear from you.

I find it sad that you’ve changed so many of your basic traits for him. Rescuing animals is an amazing thing (I’m a big dog-lover), and you gave it up for him. I couldn’t imagine giving up pets for anyone! And although I’m not too religious, I would never begrudge anyone who is, much less someone who likes to say grace. Seems like you’ve bent over backward for him.

Give me a shout and let me know how things are going. I’m pulling for you!
Anthony

Breakup Advice Separator

Thanks Anthony for your reply.

I saw him on Dec 2nd. That was when I went out to his house to take Christmas gifts to his sisters. I spent half a day, and hockey game that night. He let me touch him, and snuggle with him on the couch, even though he told me that afternoon that he had lost all feelings for me. That’s when he called me darling, pumpkin, baby. He ask me to go to Walmart with him to get more lights. Then I went to his hockey game that evening. We kissed each other before he went out on the ice for good luck. I watched his entire game. After the game and he cleaned up, I waited for him. I said that I’ll go get my clothes and spend the night with him. He said why don’t we wait another night that we don’t have to work. Said okay. He walked me to the car, and we both kissed again and hugged. I left, and called his sister that lives with him and told her I thought we were getting back together. But, when he got home, she said she asked him if we were getting back together, and he said no, and she said I told her about spending the night, and he said he didn’t tell me that. Next day I got the bad email from him of not getting back together as before. What changed him?

I haven’t spoken to him since. But I did email him, send a hand written to his house, and sent the nude picture of me on text. That all was last month too. He hasn’t called me at all. Neither has he responded to any of the emails I sent him.

For 10 years he phoned me every day when he is on the road. He travels weekly for his work, leaving on Monday and returning on Thursday. Thursday night he plays hockey, Saturday morning, and Sunday night. We get together in between. Also, I had the animals to take care of. Even a blind cat I fed everyday down the street for 2 years until I had to put it to sleep.
He would say that I need to get rid of some of those____cats. I even had turtles that I rescued also to feed. Big responsibility. That was the only thing I heard him complain about.

I’m back to the no contact rule. I have cut of even his sisters, and his ex wife from talking with them or emailing them. They feel really bad for me. We were all close, and enjoyed each others company. Do you think there is hope. I don’t want to make a mistake and lose him for good.

How do I rekindle the spark between us? Anthony, you are the expert in these matters.

He lives 40 minutes away from me. I don’t know if he misses me, cause when we broke up he was going places, like Las Vegas with his buddies, trying to stay away from Houston. He went to Cancun with some friends and their 20 yr old daughters/friends. I was suppose to go on that trip with him too. But he didn’t include me because we had already broken up. What do you suggest I do that would get him interested. Make him jealous?

Thanks, Margery

Breakup Advice Separator

Sounds like you’re doing the right things right now.

The last few months have been full of holidays. This means he’s been around people, family, etc… You said yourself that he vacationed a lot as well. All of this means he’s had zero to no time alone, and that translates to little to no time missing you.

Perhaps in the coming weeks he’ll miss you more, simply because everything dies down. There are no more holidays until Easter (except for Valentine’s day, which is when he’ll certainly think of you) and he’ll be home more.

Cutting yourself off from his family is a good move. Cutting off all contact, including Facebook, etc… is a GREAT one. If you’re still friends on Facebook, I’d suggest disconnecting that tie. As hard as it might be, it’ll make him nervous that maybe, just maybe, you’re finally moving on.

Do you think he’s got someone else? I don’t mean to get too personal, but how often was the sex between you? If he’s gone from having a constant sex life to having none at all, I’d wonder if maybe he’s not seeing another girl. But if there was little to no sex toward the end of the relationship to begin with, that’ll make it a bit harder for him to miss you.

In the end you’ve done what he asked (with the animals). When you DO start talking to him again, make sure he realizes you’ll have a lot more time for him. But don’t make it sound like you’re desperate to be with him either. Doing your own thing – and yes, perhaps making him jealous – is the best thing you can do at this point.

Breakup Advice Separator

Unfortunately we haven’t had sex for quite some time (3 years), hard to believe. But, he never overtly said to me, “hey what’s wrong here?” I really didn’t think he wanted any cause he never said anything. He told me the last time I saw him that he hinted to me. Maybe he was waiting for me to make the move. He didn’t communicate to me that he was unhappy with our relationship at any time. He could be seeing someone now, and that is why he is ignoring me. I guess I could try to make him jealous with going out with someone else.

And I will disconnect his family from my face book. I have already unfriended him. He has not blocked me from his face book either.

I will keep you posted. Do you think that I have lost him forever? I pray that he comes back around.

Breakup Advice Separator

Well, the no sex thing is tough. Not saying it’s anyone’s fault in particular, but if he hasn’t touched you in that long he might not be interested in sex at all anymore.

Beyond sex however, there are many other methods of attachment. Did you ever live together? It’s hard to cut someone out of your life that you’ve been seeing and talking to every day. He wouldn’t just do that without another person to make the transition more seamless, which is why I think maybe he’s got someone else. Even if not physically, mentally and emotionally.

As cool as it is that you’re friends with his family, and even his ex wife, those casual everyday relationships are stacking the deck against you. The more you talk to them – even about innocent little things – the more he’ll hear about it (and the less he’ll need to hear from you).

Right now his ex-wife is saying stuff like “Oh, she’s still hung up on you… poor thing. I told her you’ve moved on and she should too.” Translated to him: this girl isn’t going anywhere ANYTIME soon. Which means he can pretty much blow you off and do whatever he wants, knowing he can get you back anytime.

To fix this situation, you need to cut off all possible information your ex boyfriend could get about you: friends, family, co-workers, etc… This will create distance. Mystery. Suddenly you’ve disappeared, and he doesn’t know where you are. He’s not sure whether or not he can get you back, and that leads to something extremely important (possibly even most important): him second-guessing himself.

While you’re doing this, you need to go out and have the best possible time without him. When and if he does hear anything about you, it should be that you were out laughing and having a great time. He should hear – through the grapevine and not directly – that you’ve been going places and doing things and NOT ASKING ABOUT HIM AT ALL. And yes, if you happen to go out on a few dates with someone else? That’s certain to spark jealousy, which in turn will spark his interest. You don’t have to throw yourself at the first guy you see, or even get serious about anyone… just going out casually with a guy or guy(s) should be enough – when coupled with a complete lack of contact on your part – to let him know he’d better do one of two things: step up and get back in touch with you OR face the possibility of losing you for good.

I’m not entirely sure you’ve lost him forever. He’s gone quite some time without initiating contact, but then again, you’ve been the one contacting him. Calling him. Sending him invites and photos. Those things might be enough to feed his ego and make him strong. Take them away and he might weaken, only time will tell. You just have to be absolutely extreme in your no contact. Even the smallest “most innocent” email or text could break weeks of silence.

Let’s see what happens on Valentine’s day. If you’re completely silent between then and now, I wonder if he won’t at least send you an e-card or email mentioning that he’s thinking about you. What do you think?

Breakup Advice Separator

Anthony, You are great! Thank you so much.

I really appreciate your guidance. God knows I need it.

The sex thing, well when I went out to his house the second time, and we were setting on the couch close together he let me put my hand almost on his leg very close to his you know what without taking his hand away either. I was surprised because in the near past he would move my hand away. And remember the night of the hockey game we talked about spending the night together, and then he changed his mind the next day.

I’m going to unfriend his relatives on my face book too like you said would help me. I never lived with him. We talked about marriage, but he didn’t want all those animals around him he said in his house. He’s not an animal person either.

I don’t think he would send me a Valentine. He always sent me flowers at work or just give them to me on the weekend when I would see him. If he’s dating someone then he will probably get them the Valentine. I need to find out if he is dating someone. Thanks again so much, Margery

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