When to Call Your Ex - Best Ways to Contact Your Ex Boyfriend

If you're trying to fix your break up, you cannot go too fast or too slow. So when it comes to ex boyfriend contact, it's important not to blow it.

Contact Ex Boyfriend
You want to call him... but should you?

One of the biggest hazards of post-breakup communication is understanding when and how you should be contacting your ex. Do it too much or too soon, and you can drive your boyfriend in the opposite direction. But wait too long and you could also lose him forever.

This type of situation is tough, and doesn't come with a rulebook... so if you're looking to win back your exboyfriend but unsure of how to do it? The following guidelines will help put you on the right track.

In the old days, choices were very limited for how you got in touch with someone you once dated. But in today's world of instant electronic gratification? The online world is a virtual minefield of pitfalls and mistakes you can make while trying to get your ex back. Email, text messaging, Twitter, Facebook, Myspace... the list goes on and on.

Trying to get back together with your boyfriend can be made easier or harder with the use of these tools. You can't use them too much, but you also can't ignore them completely. So when communicating with your ex? It's important to keep the following rules in place:

Text-Messaging Your Ex Boyfriend

One of the most popular forms of communication today, millions of text-messages go out to millions of couples each day. But should you text your boyfriend after he breaks up with you? Certainly not initially. Any form of contact should be avoided right after the break up, giving your ex time to miss you while giving him the space to think about things. But when you do begin talking again? Text messaging your exboyfriend is usually not recommended.

There are several reasons that the text message is bad, the first being that these types of conversations almost always get misconstrued. Is your ex mad at you, frustrated, annoyed, or upset? Impossible to tell, without hearing his voice. Text conversations also tend to carry on and on over long periods of time, and your ex might be doing something else. And if you ask what he's doing? He might think you're checking up on him, or feel mildly interrogated. Save text messaging for only the most rudimentary contact, and keep any conversations extremely short. If you have more to say, write an email or call your ex up.

Emailing Your Exboyfriend After the Break

If your boyfriend broke up with you, getting an email is probably the best way he could hear from you. It's non-intrusive, he doesn't have to reply instantly, and it gives him time to think through his response. Unlike text-messaging, it doesn't put him on the spot. As with all exboyfriend contact, limit your emails and keep them on the shorter side. If you're trying to win your boyfriend back, you need to go slow and allow him the time to miss you. He can't miss you if you flood his inbox.

Writing Notes & Cards to Your Ex

One of the first things that happens after an unwanted breakup is usually pretty common: you get home, grab a pen, and immediately start writing.

Writing Note to Ex Boyfriend
He doesn't want a note... so don't write one.

You start saying all the things you need to say to your ex; maybe you're angry, upset, confused, or just want to profess your love for him. But what you fail to understand is that you're really doing all this pouring your heart out stuff for yourself, and not for your exboyfriend.

Sending your ex a card or long handwritten note is not such a good idea right after he breaks up with you. It's always best to wait a while and sort your feelings out. However, this doesn't mean you shouldn't write. Getting this stuff out on paper can sometimes make you feel better, even if you don't end up giving such letters to your exboyfriend. And if you do need to send him something? Write it, wait a day, and then read it again. If it still makes sense, then you can send it - but always exercise caution before communicating with your ex, especially if the breakup is still fresh.

Myspace, Facebook & Your Ex Boyfriend - How to Handle It

As if breaking up weren't hard enough, you might also have the added burden of being friends with your ex on Facebook, Myspace, or any number of other social networking sites. This essentially gives him access to your daily life: what you're doing each day, how you feel, and who you were with. Moreover, it gives you access to whatever he writes on his own wall, or puts on his home page. You'll be tempted to read it and see exactly what he's doing.

The best thing to do in this type of situation? Forget Facebook for a while. Lose your Myspace password. Drop off the social map for a while, and don't check on these things. A few people will wonder where you went, but so what? Your close friends will know and understand. Trying to keep up with these websites while attempting to get back together with your boyfriend will never work. It'll always end up hurting you, and worse, hurting your chances. When it comes to this type of scenario, too much information is bad... on both sides.

Ex Boyfriend Calling - Basic Rules For Contacting Your Ex

It's extremely important not to call your ex after your break up, at least in the beginning. By dropping out of sight you're giving him time to miss you. Letting him have space to breathe will go a long way toward making your first conversation a good one... and by space I don't mean wait a day or two. It should be a few weeks before you speak to your ex on the phone again, and when you do it should be a conversation that's short and sweet. To avoid awkward silence, know what you want to say beforehand. Be happy, cheerful, and quick. In the end, you want to leave him with the impression that you were busy, had to run, and it was great to talk to him again. This will leave your ex wanting more, and another phone call will eventually follow.

No matter what you do, don't blow up your exboyfriend's phone. You can't bombard your ex with calls any more than you can with emails, text-messaging, or any other form of communication. There are some great ways of getting him to call you, and if you've left him alone he may have already done that. Speaking to your ex again is a good sign for the future, and a major step toward fixing your break up.

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