"Tag You're It!" - How to Get Your Ex to Chase After YOU
Ever miss someone? No, I mean really, really miss them?
If so, it was probably because they (or you) were very far away. You couldn't see them, you couldn't touch them, and most of all, you were counting the days and minutes until you'd finally be back together with them again.
your ex both misses and needs you again.
Longing is a powerful emotion, and we've all felt it. Yet one very important thing you might not realize?
Longing requires ABSENCE.
In other words, you'll never really miss someone until they've actually gone away. And once they're gone, the feeling of missing that person grows stronger and stronger as time goes on.
In time, the amount you miss someone will peak. This is the optimum time during which getting your ex back becomes extremely easy, if you can do what's necessary to get your ex to that point.
Once that window of opportunity starts to close, your chances go down the drain as well. Very rapidly, you could find yourself in a situation where your ex boyfriend or girlfriend's feelings are gone... and almost impossible to get back again.
To get back with an ex, you need to walk a very thin line. You'll need to employ withdrawal techniques to make your boyfriend or girlfriend miss you, but you'll also need to look for (and act upon) signs that your ex is thinking about you again. This is where getting your ex back becomes all about timing, and the execution of the right approach depending upon your own unique situation.
What Your Ex Is Thinking After They Break Up With You
One thing you need to understand very quickly is that your ex just broke up with you. This means that he or she doesn't want to see or hear from you right now, regardless of how much that hurts.
Seeing you would be very uncomfortable for your ex boyfriend or girlfriend right now. Talking to you would be equally awkward. There's nothing left to say at this point - at least on their end - so your ex isn't likely to be listening to (or the slightest bit interested in) anything you have to say.
At the same time however, your ex still wants you around after they break up with you. Confused yet? Don't be. Because the way in which they want you around is not what you think it is.
Ideally, your ex wants the breakup to stick. He or she spent a good amount of time making the decision to break things off, and they're not looking to reverse that decision (YET). This is why an ex will initially tend to distance themselves from you. This is why they can seem so cold and uncaring, whereas just a few days ago they loved you to pieces.
It's not that your ex is cold and uncaring... they still have many of the same feelings and emotional bonds they did while you were dating each other. It's just that for right now, it has to be this way. Your ex needs to push you out of her life any time you try to shove your way back in; this is the main reason begging, pleading, and reasoning with your ex just won't work. These things are actually big mistakes that will only drive your ex further away.
At the same time however, your ex wants to know "you're still there". Seeing you hanging around lets them know they can still have you back... IF they should ever want you again. Watching you chase after them strokes your ex's ego, making them tougher and more confident in the decision to break up.
There's comfort in knowing someone still loves you - even after you've rejected them. Your ex looks back over his or her shoulder after the breakup, to derive such comfort. The more you seem desperate in your get back ex approach, the more comfortable (and eventually, detached) they can be. But when your ex looks back over their shoulder and doesn't see you at all? THAT's when they start feeling uneasy, uncertain, and even worried that they made the wrong decision.
Staying Close After The Breakup vs. Withdrawal & No Contact
Now that you know what your boyfriend or girlfriend both expects and wants to see happen after the breakup, it's time to learn how to get them back. And your best course of action here? Giving them exactly what they don't want.
Think about it. Some people think just 'being around' will make it easier for their ex to want them back. But the more comfortable you make your exboyfriend or exgirlfriend in their new environment? The less likely they'll be to want to change it.
Keep your ex warm and comfy in the knowledge they can always get you back is like giving them a license to date other people. Your boyfriend or girlfriend now has the freedom of being single, but with all the security of knowing you're not looking for anyone but them. They can play the field, whether they succeed or fail, and still have the comfort of knowing you're "there for them".
That's why being there for your ex is the LAST thing you want. Being friends, being friendly, calling and texting... all of those things are destroying your chances of ever getting back with your boyfriend or girlfriend, or of making them want you again.
What you need to do here is simple: you have to go away. You need to take yourself totally and completely out of your ex's life, regardless of what they said they want from you. This is even more true in the cases where your ex has asked to remain friends, or wants to stay in touch with you after the break up. Outwardly they may be shunning you, but inwardly your ex doesn't want you to go totally away... at least not until they're 100% sure of the breakup and/or have already found someone else.
No Contact With an Ex - How and Why It Works So Well
Dating brought you close. You and your partner shared a bed, but you also shared your hearts, hopes, dreams, future, your families... in time, you got closer than two people can get without falling in love. The feelings and emotional bonds you formed were strong, and made even stronger over time.
Breaking up all at once therefore becomes an unnatural act. Just as these feelings were formed over a longer period of time, it stands to reason they would fade away in much the same manner. In other words, your ex still loves and has feelings for you. They didn't turn those feelings off like a light switch when they left the relationship, no matter what they said or did when they ended things.
For these reasons, your ex would rather let go of your relationship gradually, and at their own pace. Since they were the one who broke things off, they also think they're the one who gets to dictate the rules. Winning them back is all about shattering that ideology, and showing them differently.
No Contact is all about taking yourself immediately and totally away. This leaves a void behind; a huge whirlpool of missing thoughts and emotions in your ex's life where you actually used to be.
All at once, your ex is faced with the prospect of losing you completely. In the blink of an eye, they're slapped in the face with uncertainty. You haven't called, you haven't text-messaged... you haven't even been on Facebook or MySpace. In fact, your ex has NO CLUE where you are, what you're up to, or even better, who you might be hanging out with.
Even though your ex hadn't planned on getting back together, they also hadn't planned on you moving on so quickly. This shakes your boyfriend or girlfriend's confidence, causing them to question all their decisions regarding you, including the breakup.
Using No Contact to Get Your Ex Boyfriend or Girlfriend Back
Once you've got your ex uncomfortable with the idea of the breakup, it's time to go one step further. This is where you learn instant reversal methods geared specifically toward making your ex miss you, need you, and want you back in their life again.
Breakup Reversed is one of the few fix-your-breakup guidebooks dedicated to scenarios that seem unrepairable. It prides itself on teaching you how to get your ex back even when you think you can't.
No Hopeless Situations - it's not only the author Robert Parson's motto, it's also a state of mind. This instantly downloadable guidebook shows the down and dirty secrets of psychological warfare when it comes to getting your ex to want you back.
Not only will you regain your ex's attention and respect, but Breakup Reversed's multi-step process will actually show you how you can get your ex to chase you, instead of you chasing them. Changing how your ex currently views you becomes your first priority, and Parsons shows you several sneaky tricks that will do just that.
If for no other reason, be sure to read the success stories and testimonials from happy, loving couples who've tried and succeeded in getting back together after reading Breakup Reversed.
